The Brew Review

February 28, 2006


Filed under: English — brewreview @ 9:50 pm



Reviewed by: Oy Vey & Guinness Girl

Nationality: English

Tastes like: any of the Lord of the Rings movies.  And yes.  We know we’re going to piss some people off with this one.


[before tasting]

“Well, the obvious choice here is Harry Potter.” – Guinness Girl

“THIS is more like it!  Bubbly!” – Oy Vey

“Wow, that beer looks like a latte.” – Pico de Gallo waitress

[after tasting]

“Hmm.  Smells nice…but the taste is not so nice.  Kinda bitterish.” – GG

“Dark, but not SCARY.  A little bitter at the end.  Not fantastic.” – OV

“Should we just call it a day and call it the Harry Potter beer?” – OV

[defensively] “But I LOVE Harry Potter!” – GG

“I know, I love Harry, too.  We need a creepy fantasy creature…like the creepy guy on Lord of the Rings who whispers ‘My Precious’ a lot.”

Insert long discussion.  What is that character’s name?  (IMDB just told me it was Gollum].  Randomly, Oy Vey knows the actor’s name is Andy Circus…except spelled Serkis.  This then led to an abundance of hobbit stories, including Guinness Girl’s hatred of Sean Astin’s role in 24 these days, Sean Astin crush stories, The Goonies, Oy Vey’s participation in a Lord of the Rings marathon, and many other topics. 

The bottom line?  This isn’t BAD…but it’s awfully shtick-y to drink.

Oh, and there was a comment about it being “magic” beer.

Reviewed at: Pico de Gallo


Sam Smith Organically Produced Ale

Filed under: English,Enh... — brewreview @ 7:28 pm

Nationality: English

Reviewed by: Guinness Girl and Oy Vey

Tastes like: Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves

“What’s it called? It’s citrusy. It’s orangey.” – GG
[Long discussion of other citrusy beer.]

“I don’t like this beer.” – OV

“I don’t mind it. I could drink it on a really hot day. I wouldn’t kick it out my fridge.” – GG

[Noticeable shiver from Oy Vey]

“It does have a hint of Lysol.” – GG

“I do not like this beer.” [Noticeable shiver] – OV

Oy Vey does not like this beer, yet Guinnes Girl doesn’t mind it. It’s a Kevin Costner movie.

Reviewed at: Pico de Gallo

Young’s Luxury Double Chocolate Stout

Filed under: Asbolute Swill,English — brewreview @ 5:34 pm


Nationality: From England’s Oldest Brewery

Reviewed by: Guinness Girl and Oy Vey

Tastes like: Brown Bunny
“Tastes like unsweetened chocolate.” – OV

[Discussion about Johnny Depp]

“Cute!” – OV
“Creepy!” GG

[Discussion about Orlando Bloom]

“Cuter as Legolas.” – OV
“Creepy as Legolas.” – GG

“Tastes like beer plus cocoa powder. Wretched.” – OV

“Ewww. You’re the baker, you know. Totally smells like Chocolate [taste]. Ewww…Yeah. I dont know if I’d call this Absolute Swill. Man. What an odd combination of taste. I don’t want to waste my sobriety on this.”

“Too wannabe artsy. Doesn’t pull it off. Shall we go suck on the devil’s teat?”*

“This beer invokes anger.” GG
“Then it must be Absolute Swill.” OV

*Some such stout called Devil’s Milk was suggested to us by the lovely lass at Pico de Gallo.

Reviewed at: Pico de Gallo

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